The Annulment - Opening the Envelope
The tribunal seal made it official |
But now I am sitting here in a house that I know for the next few hours will be quiet, if not exactly peaceful as I look around at the clutter five active boys have left for me while they are at their father's this weekend. This is what I was waiting for. Time alone to cry if I feel like it, to jump up and dance and sing if I feel like it, to do whatever feels right in the moment.
I am not sure how I will feel when the verdict is read, but by having a few moments alone to digest whatever the outcome is, I am giving myself freedom to just Be in God and let Him handle my future. I don't have to worry about the boys seeing my tears or pretend all is okay - when I feel like dying inside.
I really am not sure what I will feel when I open this envelope, and I study the outside of it for one more moment, holding more than an envelope in my hand, holding a part of my future, a part of my faith, knowing that whatever I hold in my hand is nothing compared to how I sit in God's hand.
To read the rest, please go to Single Mom Smiling.
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