What to do with ashes

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After reading an article about a couple whose 15 month old daughter died from a terminal disease, I can't resist clarifying a few things. You see, although it seems like a sweet idea--they had their daughter's ashes made into pretty, white stones--it's just not okay, on several levels.

To honor the dead, we need to bury them (or their ashes in an urn) in a sacred, permanent place. They should not be stored at home. If anyone wishes to keep some of the ashes, they need to go to an ecclesial authority of the Church, who can evaluate the request. This is both "canonical and pastoral."

Cremains are not to be scattered, spread under a tree, made into jewelry (or stones), put in a shotgun shell for your next turkey hunt, inserted in a coral reef, or shot into space (examples from cnn.com).

Why? What's all the fuss about?

Honor and respect for the human body. The cremains need to be carefully identified so that the name of the deceased is not forgotten. They must be in a permanent, sacred place where they can be remembered and prayed for.

Here is the language:

"The ecclesiastical authority, in compliance with current civil norms, may consider and evaluate a request by a family to preserve in an appropriate way a minimal part of the ashes of their relative in a place of significance for the history of the deceased person, provided that every type of pantheistic, naturalistic, or nihilistic misunderstanding is ruled out and also provided that the ashes of the deceased are kept in a sacred place.” (vatican)

Please note the necessity of the intervention of the ecclesiastical authority, who must consider the "current civil norms." 
 
It is understandable that this may be difficult for some families to follow, and it requires a humble submission to the dignity of the person, and God who created them.
 
According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, Paragraph 2300:
 
"The bodies of the dead must be treated with respect and charity, in faith and hope of the Resurrection. The burial of the dead is a corporal work of mercy; it honors the children of God, who are temples of the Holy Spirit."

Also, please note, that while your state may allow the spreading of ashes, that doesn't make it proper to do so. It might "feel" like the thing to do, and it might seem "nice," but a higher authority than your state government, knows best.

May God's grace keep you faithful this Lent.

Janet Cassidy
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